Grandma passed away early Tuesday morning, February 12th. She was a such a strong woman and she fought this last bout of pneumonia as long as she could, but in the end I guess it was time for her to go. Although I'm deeply saddened that I was not able to be there with her in the end, I take great solace in the fact that the rest of my family was there. She was surrounded by people who loved her, that were part of her everyday life, and that she loved in return -- I know that meant a lot to her. The day before she passed I was able to talk to her to on the phone -- I told her that I love her, that Jake loves her and we will greatly miss her but she'll be with us in our hearts and memories forever. Grandma was such an important person and influence in my life - it makes me very sad that she'll never get to meet Elise and Elise will never know her great-grandma, but we will tell Elise all about her.
As I was growing up, Grandma was a great role model. She was always so strong and independent, and she fostered those same qualities in me. I have no doubt that I would not be the person I am today if it weren't for her. She taught me that life is sometimes hard and not always fair, but that you just have to make the best of it and never give up. She taught me not to let your mistakes hold you back from doing what you know is right or from following your dreams. Sometimes you just have to be able to laugh at yourself, hopefully learn from it, and go on.
I remember Grandma -- especially before the Alzheimer's -- as a feisty woman with a great spirit who was not afraid to share what was on her mind with others. She wasn't one to sugarcoat things just to make you feel better - if you did something wrong in her eyes, she'd definitely let you know. But, she never judged and I always felt that, no matter what, my Grandma would always be there for me and would always love me. I felt the same way about her.
When I think of Grandma, I'm reminded of...hot fudge sundaes, gourmet mints from Window Garden, homemade waffles with powdered sugar, late night mystery movies on Saturday nights - Perry Mason and "Murder She Wrote", 10:30 mass at Mother of God Church and getting coffee and donuts afterwards, playing cards, watching her bowl on her bowling league, going with her "to town" to get her hair done at the salon, the story of how Grandpa proposed to her (by putting her ring in the toe of one of her ice skates)...
Although I feel like I could go on forever about the wonderful person she was and how much she meant to me, I'm going to try to sum it up in a few fond memories...
Growing up, Michael and I spent just about every weekend (at least Saturday night) with Grandma. It was always a treat and we always looked forward to going with her. Grandma was not only the Queen of Sweet Tooths, but also a night owl with a penchant for late night mystery movies. Therefore, Saturday nights at Grandma's always entailed chocolate fudge sundaes and late night movies.
Then, of course, there's my love of playing cards that I got from my Grandma. I remember her teaching me how to shuffle (do the "bridge") and the ins and outs of card games such as Gin, Rummy, Solitaire, and Poker from a very early age. Playing cards with Grandma was always a favorite past time. Not to mention, she had a great collection of different decks of cards. I used to enjoy just looking through them all, listening to her stories about where they came from, and picking out which deck we'd play with that night.
Grandma wasn't always just fun and games, though. She was always very adamant that Michael and I learn proper manners and behave in respectable ways - especially when it came to "bathroom talk." For example, she would absolutely cringe if one of us would say that needed to "pee." To her, this was just vulgar and she made it a point to let us know that, insisting that we say "piddle" and not "pee." Have no doubt, this was a very serious topic where Grandma was concerned. Well, one night just after having received this lecture from Grandma, we sat down for dinner at Grandma's and lo and behold she made peas. As we were passing around bowls and serving ourselves, Michael, being the ever quick witted kid he was, in a very serious tone of voice, asked Grandma to "please pass the piddles." There was a moment of utter silence and shock - as I said, the whole "piddle" thing was a very serious topic for Grandma - but it quickly evaporated into laughter. Even Grandma couldn't help but laugh - she admonished both of us afterwards, of course, and although it might seem like a strange memory for me to bring up, for some reason I'll never forget that night. I guess you just had to be there.
As I write this, I realize that my memories of growing up with Grandma are too numerous for me to list. Then there are also all the memories of Grandma with Jake.
Grandma really loved playing with Jake, and Jake loved playing with her too. She'd crawl after him on the floor, and laugh and giggle like a school girl as she played with him. One of their favorite games to play was the "Wheels on the bus." They would sit on the steps - Jake (being the driver, of course) on the step in front of Grandma - and they'd sing the song (with all the hand movements and gestures). They'd also take pretend trips around the neighborhood picking up different people and things. I find great happiness in the fact that Jake had the opportunity to know my Grandma and enjoy her company as much as she enjoyed his.
Although gone from this world, Grandma will never leave my heart. I'll think about her every day. I'm so thankful that she was part of my life and that I have all the great memories of her that I do. I'll always remember her as being the strongest woman I've ever known.
As he rambled on about how she'd be walking around soon and all the benefits of being able to able to get around by yourself and not having to be carried, she even looked a little entertained.
As Jake continued rambling, desperately trying to think of things to say to a baby and keep her attention, his conversation became more and more nonsensical. Elise seemed to sense this and began looking at him inquisitively as if wondering, "what the heck are you talking about?"
Finally, she gave up trying to make sense of what he was saying and looked away as if she was bored.
In a final attempt to regain her attention, Jake resorted to the only thing he could think of...he started making faces at her. Hey, whatever works!
